INFLUENCE AND BE INFLUENCED By Jadesola M.O

Life is not meant to be lived alone – individual has a life to live, no doubt but definitely not in isolation; relating with another is needed, if not highly needed . Either by default or by intent, socializing becomes statutory and influencing one another is inevitable –  Peer pressure is birth out of socialization, there is however positive and negative peer pressure, these negative effects is the area of concentration at the moment.  Almost everyone, if not all has experience peer pressure before, what makes it differs is how it is managed or handled so to speak.

A person who belongs to the same age group or social group as someone else is known as peer while pressure is the act of pressing or pushing against something. Peer pressure is the direct influence on people, it is an effect on those individuals who get encouraged to follow their peers by changing their attitudes, values or behavior to conform to those of the influencing group or individual. By the teenage years, peers are the most influential group as teenagers navigate finding an identity and figuring out the roles that they play. This pressure to conform can sometimes be very powerful and hard to resist.

The life of teens are to be saved from the negative effects of peer pressure which has continued to dent their image from time immemorial, a lot of positive dreams, vision and ideas have been aborted due to peer pressure just because some of them are gullible, while some others make themselves vulnerable which makes them to be at the mercy of the influencing party. Although, some of these teens are able to pull through, some are still carried away by exictment of being teenager, all in the name of “feeling among” they get to do what the would ordinarily not do. Some of these young boys and girls has a tender heart thus prone to following any kind of advise that comes their way without taking taught on the moral status of the person involved or the moral consequences of yielding to such advise.

Among the effects of peer pressure are the these, those which negatively affects teens: Insults – when you make a person feel bad for not doing something, so that they eventually will to do it or do it. Another one is Reasoning, pressure by giving a person reasons why they should do something. Also, we have Rejection – it is a pressure by threatening to end a relationship or a friendship. Unspoken pressure top the list, and it’s simply seeing all your peers doing something or wearing something, especially when it’s things you feel you can’t afford as at then – there is every tendency you feel pressured, wanting to meet their standard. In an hostel occupied by four students, three of them live a care free life and are into the “enterprise of slay queen” – they get all they need at the tap of their fingers since they trade what they have for what they want. The fourth occupant is a young lady who is used to living a reserved life, she keeps to herself and respects people opinion. Soon, she was influenced through pressure from her new set of friends who claims her lifestyle is boring and need to be spiced up, she yielded to their advise and soon realise that it wasn’t the best for her. It was rather too late because she has gone far into the act of promiscuity. Remember you can’t eat your cake and have it, she was already pregnant and infected with sexually transmitted diseases – her hope was dashed, she felt miserable and couldn’t get herself back on track. It is such a pity, only if she had stayed with her focus.

Let’s say it in the valley and also on the mountain top into the ears of the teens that peer pressure is to be handled with due care, where one cannot totally stay away from one’s peers then one must relate with proper care consciously looking out for pit fall that has been or may be set as trap for oneself. Teenagers, be it known to you that your so called friends can think and perhaps plan evil for you therefore you have to be very careful and relate with a high level of sensitivity – I will advise that you know what you want, aim at achieving them so that no one can make you derail from that part no matter what it takes, a teenager that doesn’t have a purpose or goals for themselves are such who are easily carried away by pressure from friends. Here are some of the ways to resist pressure from peers: Understand and acknowledge your own values and beliefs, have Self-confidence and high self – esteem, in choosing friends, choose wisely, talk to a trusted adult, someone you can confide in and express your feelings sincerely, Don’t make excuses

This is not to say that you should not seek advice or counsel, the point is that you seek with your “brain at alert”, look before you leap.  Remember, if you don’t choose your friends, you might not have the best of them. Know when to say “No” and (or) “yes”, you can’t afford to give in for anything, take caution and safe yourself from the stress of negative peer pressure, peer pressure could be dangerous. It’s a pressure truly but you can choose not to be pressurised.

 


Facebook, Instagram and Twitter @osundotlife

Advertising on osun.life targets thousands of readers every day from Osun State and from all over the world. With a direct weekly reach of 70,000 and extended weekly reach of 200,000. Call Raphael on 07034651034 or check our rates page

Have a scoop or story suggestion that osun.life should cover? You can email your tip to us directly at editor@osun.life. We will respect your anonymity.

Interested in writing for us? Send an email to editor@osun.life tell us a bit about yourself and attach a writing sample.

(4)